The Road Less Travelled…or is it?


Feelings of severe despondency and dejection. “Self-doubt creeps in and that swiftly turns to depression”

A feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease about something with an uncertain outcome. “She felt a surge of anxiety”

When I first told my Fiancé that I thought I had anxiety and depression nine months ago, I felt like such a burden to him. I mean, when you think of what words you could associate with Depression, you may think sad, miserable, negative, suicidal. In the past I’d never really understood Anxiety and what it entails. I’ve always been quite a nervous person; second guessing myself and constantly over thinking all the time, so just presumed this was just normal until those behaviours intensified late last year. 
‘We need the old Nat back’
‘But you’re always laughing and joking about…’
‘But you’re always posting photos of you smiling/on nights out on Facebook, how could you possibly be depressed?’
Mental Health charity Mind have revealed that almost 1 in 10 people are living with both Combined Anxiety and Depression, which in fact makes this type of mental health disorder the most common diagnosis in the UK.

That’s the trouble with any statistic though, isn’t it? The figures are based on those brave individuals who have plucked up the courage to seek the support of their GP. Sadly, it’s not a true reflection of the reality. The same can be said for Crime. Various incidents happen, but how many victims actually report it to the Police?

So what can combined Anxiety and Depression feel like?


I am no medical expert so I can only recall my own experiences here… It’s like you want people to understand what’s going on but you don’t want to talk to just anyone. You feel like you’re bothering them with your negative thoughts or even appear to be attention seeking or overdramatic. Everyone has their own lives and responsibilities to deal with, don’t they? They take on more responsibilities yet they seem to manage it all, why can’t I?

Every night the Brain is wide awake, buzzing with what feels like hundreds of ‘to do’ actions and thoughts whizzing around my head. Conversations, situations, events from the day and times gone by… You attempt to cancel them out with positive thoughts of the future, moving into your own home, your upcoming Wedding day, Holidays etc. yet they soon fade away, out of my mind’s reach to the extent that you believe you will never see those days come. 


I wonder how many others are showing signs of anxiety and depression but are too afraid to ask for help?

Around three months ago I reached a point where I knew I needed to do something. None of this was fair on my Fiancé and our relationship and I didn’t want to bring these feelings into my married life! 

So I took the plunge, and visited my GP. Explained my previous pressures I had been under, the physical symptoms, bad sleeping and eating habits etc. and was referred to a local Charity called ThinkAction Surrey. 

I will publish another post about my sessions with ThinkAction Surrey soon. Whilst it’s quite nerve-racking to publically open up I think it’s important to share my experiences and the techniques I have learned throughout my time with them to support others who find themselves wandering down the same path but are not in a position to reach out for support.

Should you feel you need urgent support, or you have immediate concerns for yourself or others, and you don’t want to contact your GP, speak to the Samaritans on 116 123. 

Feel free to leave me your comments, thoughts and experiences below, and lets break down this Taboo of talking about Mental health!



2 thoughts on “The Road Less Travelled…or is it?

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